The weight of the Divine Feminine.

I posted a tiktok today about how the main character of the movie ‘Encanto,’ Mirabel, was the divine feminine of the family. She was overlooked and did not receive a door. Her family, particularly her abuela, looked down on her because of the fear that was created from that experience. They questioned whether they might be losing the ‘miracle.’ Mirabel was the only one that did not exhibit a phenomenal gift that could help the family. Except, she did. She was the divine feminine, the alchemist.

Internal divine gifts are often overlooked because the external, divine masculine, gifts can be experienced outwardly and often benefit the people around them. These external experiences can be in reference to mediums connecting to passed-on loved ones, channeling divine beings that give incredible insight, or tarot or psychic readers that try to help bring clarity to a situation. It’s mesmerizing and captivating especially when the stars align and the information brought forward is validated. People are reawakening in droves to the beauty and amazing magic of the divine. A huge key component of that has been the external and provable gifts from the divine masculine, like evidence based mediumship.

This technique has been talked about much more lately and has helped build mediums into their highest capabilities. Not only do people believe the medium is speaking with their loved one, but the mediums are giving their clients peace, love, and comfort knowing their loved one is still right here with them. These gifts are necessary and needed. They are awe inspiring and mind-boggling. They represent the beauty that can be tapped into when we access the divine.

However, the divine feminine lies within, not without. When a divine feminine approaches people with their gifts they’re met with discontent and at worst, anger. The internal gifts the divine feminine hold are more aligned with what we experience inside of our being. A few that I experience are transmutation and alchemy, which can also tend to work hand in hand. Transmutation, to keep it simple, is the ability to encounter lower vibrations and change them into higher ones; which is accomplished almost automatically in comparison with alchemy which requires a choice to be made.

Something I experience often is that when I meet people they will trauma dump on me, because, intuitively, they know that they can release those energies; and I will be able to transmute it. People would often walk away not knowing why they’d told me their story, and for a long time I didn’t understand it either. I thought “I must just be really approachable and nonjudgmental.” Because what also happens, is that I don’t usually react to what people tell me. I take it in, let it go, and we both move on. I did, however, have to practice this, because there are denser energies that can be difficult to transmute if we hold onto them.

This is when I learned that it’s important to be compassionate, but not empathetic. When we empathize we take on the experience as though it’s happening to us. This may seem like a valiant effort. Empathy can help change people’s minds on subjects they have no actual experience with, but when it fails to be productive is when we take on other people’s burdens. This is when I realized that my empathic ability required limits so that I can live peacefully. I can have deep compassion for anyone’s story, but when I empathize I take on that energy and hold it within myself instead of releasing it and transmuting it outwards.

For instance, I have a close loved one that experienced a trauma, and the fact that I know this person already makes the situation difficult, because I care so deeply for them. What I was experiencing was that my empathy for this loved one was causing me to hold onto their story in my heart, and the only release available was to cry it out. I had to feel it in order to release it. I had to express it, because I had taken it on as my own, instead of letting it flow through me with compassion. Releasing lower energies this way is taxing. It takes a lot of energy to feel the pain like that, and the body too releases it through it’s own processes. It’s like when a channeler lets in the energy of whomever they’re channeling. For some, that higher vibrational energy is uplifting, until they come down from it to their normal vibration. The process can take a toll on the body in it’s own way and require the channeler to rest.

Then, there’s alchemy, which is the process of dealing with our own energies. The traumas and beliefs we hold inside of ourselves can be released when we use an alchemical approach. This process is often less painful than experiencing external tower moments that bring forth these energies in much more painful ways. For example, instead of experiencing the loss of your house to bankruptcy, question and challenge those beliefs that pop up beforehand that you have about material things, or your beliefs about lack and scarcity. There’s usually always a deeper belief that stems from these moments, and they’re usually what we’re trying to learn when we have those dark nights of the soul.

“When we hit our lowest point, we are open to the greatest change” - Aang, ‘Legend of Korra’

Sometimes alchemy can be used in combination with transmutation when what we say triggers other people’s wounds. Growing up as a divine feminine, I was often chastised for my gifts, because people don’t like getting triggered. They don’t like to be challenged, especially people who are in positions of authority, like parents, teachers, or any other authority figure. Because being challenged means that your competency is being questioned. And instead of looking at the situation and asking oneself “how can I grow from this?” their trigger becomes an outlet for anger and resentment.

Getting triggered doesn’t feel good, and when a person triggers us we blame them for the pain that was brought on from being triggered. I experienced this a lot while raising my son, my greatest teacher. He challenged me in so many ways, and although I had the capacity to look at my own actions and grow from the situations, I still blamed him for how it made me feel. I began to build up so much resentment towards him, because being triggered didn’t feel good. I pointed the blame at him for how I felt, instead of remembering that people can’t make you feel anything that doesn’t already exist within you. He simply was the catalyst that drew them out.

This is the ultimate crux of being a (healed) divine feminine. People are triggered by the truth we speak. Our authenticity in and of itself is triggering to people, because they live under so many layers of socialized conditioning and trauma. They believe they’re justified, because that’s the way they’ve always done it, but repetition doesn’t make it right. As a divine feminine we are faced with the more difficult side of the divine. We inspire change, but at the hands of another person’s choice. It’s a choice to choose growth over hardening into your beliefs. Everyone has the divine free will to choose to live miserably or to release their chains and rise up. They can choose to live in what they know, or they can choose to walk into freedom. But fear is a powerful energy. It can paralyze people, or it can make them act out in hate.

That is what the divine feminine faces. That is the weight and the pain that’s brought forth to us. It takes a great deal of resilience and strength to carry on with our authenticity. But what’s immeasurably more important is to remember that we also have a choice. We can choose to hold onto what people say and believe about us, or we can let it go. We can choose not to carry people’s reactions to our gifts. They might want to burden us with their baggage, but we don’t have to carry it. I’ve already let down my bags. I don’t intend to pick up anyone else’s. Always remember, my divine feminines, that we can choose, too. We can choose ourselves and act within our divine power, or we can accept that other people’s pain outweighs our authenticity. I don’t plan on sacrificing my happiness anytime soon.