Who are you?

When people think of a spiritual path, enlightenment, or alchemy there’s this assumption of what that’s supposed to look like. Mahatma Gandhi, Jesus Christ (or Yeshua), Buddha, Paramahansa Yogananda and Mother Meera are only a few of a large list of spiritual masters. When we look at them, besides being divinely guided and spiritually aware, they’re primarily living as an archetype. Typically spiritually gifted, aware, peaceful, sometimes pacifists, yet passionate teachers that are here to enlighten humanity and create change. But I’d like to challenge this ideology, this stereotyped understanding of what it means to be enlightened.

As you travel along your journey you will encounter people as mentors, teachers, and even masters of their craft. They may tell you things that you, as a novice, will assume is correct based on this person’s resume. Much like when I had expounded on vertical morality, it’s important to keep in mind that our culture and society puts great emphasis and authority in the hands of those who we deem to be subject matter experts. This authority prevents us from thinking critically, since we’ve been raised to listen to our teachers and conflating their position with being scrupulous.

This is another occasion that I’d challenge you to listen to your own intuition as often as you possibly can. Many teachers will tell you what worked for them. They will instruct you on the path that they have knowledge on, but that doesn’t mean it will also work for you. The brilliance of our existence is that no two people are the same. We all have unique experiences, as well as unique lineages of family experiences that shape our realities, too. It would be absurd to ask every individual to embrace these aspects of “Enlightenment” and to shed away everything that makes you unique.

There are many paths for a reason. People choose what resonates with themselves. Maybe it’s Abrahamic religion, maybe it’s Taoism or any other Eastern philosophies, but ultimately, there is no singular path that will guarantee enlightenment for every individual. This reality is based on belief, but belief alone will not create the experiences that we desire. We must also be aligned with them and place intention into our belief. What works for one, may not resonate with another. Therefore, if there are so many paths, how can we expect every person to exist in the same way?

I’ve come to realize - use your discernment, now - that there is no escaping who we are, and we shouldn’t feel the need to. We are all unique, and I continue to say this to truly emphasize the importance of understanding this, and who we are is deeply, vitally, profoundly important to the world. Your unique expression goes through a difficult process of experiences that can only be expressed by you. Let go of your hierarchies for a second and really look at yourself. You are irreplaceable. Your value does not derive from what’s in your bank account, but instead comes from what you can offer from your unique experience.

It’s funny, because as I sit here and ponder the word “value” I just come to the understanding that it’s not a very useful word. We feel worthless if we don’t have value, but if everyone has value, then there is no differentiation in worth applicable because everything is of equal value. Why must we have worth or value? Is it simply a root in an old system paradigm that wants us to adhere to capitalism, or some other form of financial structure? We attribute value and worth to things, places, and services, but we should not do that to people. Because any given day could be what turns a wealthy man into a dead man on the street. What is your value, then?

Getting off that proverbial pedestal, I’d like to redirect this back to you, friend. Don’t look at your path as something that requires you to conform and adhere to. Challenge yourself to grow, and ask yourself difficult questions, but don’t try to reshape yourself to fit into some enlightenment box that society deems acceptable.

My wife struggled with the concept of grace when we were actively attending church. Her parents would say that she needed to work on her gracefulness, and I don’t mean her coordination, but her ability to be kind to people who don’t deserve it. She really began to feel shameful that she couldn’t just do it. Gracefulness is one of the fruits of the spirit, and she wanted to exude that. But after a while of struggling, and some time deconstructing the rules of religion (what humanity has created) she realized that people were wrong about her.

People wanted my wife to be more “graceful” so that she would be more palatable, and she wouldn’t offend people. The key here is that religion, and the people serving in that religion, were telling her to change to make themselves feel better. They wanted my wife to change so that her character, honesty, integrity and straightforwardness wouldn’t hurt other people’s feelings. My wife doesn’t speak without intention, and her intention is never from a cruel space.

But when people heard what she said, they perceived it as a challenge against their ego, and they didn’t like how it felt. Instead of taking her words as a new perspective and a challenge to learn from, they hardened into themselves and became defensive. They projected their discomfort back onto her, and told her that she was the problem. This way they could exist in the same way without changing and feel more comfortable around her. They told her to change and conform to their liking, so they didn’t have to do the hard work to grow.

People don’t like to feel challenged. It feels incredibly uncomfortable and can make us question things that we thought we knew. When we feel uncertain, people tend to equate this to a lack of intellect and a questionable standing.

(Which mirrors the delicate balance of conformity = safety due to people’s penchant at exiling and executing the nonconformists back in the day. This just shows how, with alchemy, we can see that this fear exists in the deeper layers behind what’s present in our conscious minds and try to transform it into something new. It extends back into our ancestry, yet still affects us to this day; however, this doesn’t mean it affects us forever.)

This is also a major reason why people don’t question their religion, because one, they benefit from the status quo already in place, and if it were to falter, they’d lose their standing, position, or power; and two, it just feels frightening. When people believe so deeply in something and they give their entire being to it, the last thing they want to do is entertain the idea that they could be wrong. Their lives revolve around this system of beliefs. What does life look like without it? How do you even navigate through the depths of where this piece of your identity goes? Where does it end? Who even are you without it?

But, this is why it’s important to listen to your intuition. Listen to who you are and don’t let other people dictate who you should be. This journey of spiritual alchemy is all about learning who you are. Let go of and challenge societal norms, people’s expectations of you, and those outside sources, and instead look inward. Ask yourself “what do I like” and “who am I?” Because you’re the only one who can answer that question. We’ve relied on other people telling us who we are and who to be for too long. This is the time of the individual and understanding that our expressions are invaluable, important and unique.